Minor disclaimer: I'm in a peculiar spot, in this discussion. I teach graduate courses, so I'm not at a "real school." I'm also near enough to New York City to get regular news from there, but far enough that my schools were blissfully untouched by their idiocy. So it's arguable that I don't really know what the heck I'm talking about.
Minor warning: I'm jumping from topic to topic almost at random. I'll try to edit it together, but chances are that'll make it even more confusing. And I apologize for that in advance.
That said, beyond parents, there's also usually the school board. They seem to hate the idea of parental interaction. I've even heard Columbia (where all hare-brained educational theories arise--it's like Buffy's Hellmouth, but for stupidity, I think) people suggest that the increased focus on homework and after-school activities is to keep the parents' activity to a minimum. And don't forget training the parents early by claiming the kids for earlier and earlier preschool!
I disagree a little with you, though, Jim. My parents were very much the precursors of today's "let's wrap everything in Nerf so nobody can possibly ever be hurt" helicopter parents. My mother would--I kid you not--try to change nursery rhymes on me (and later my sister), because she didn't want me hearing about kids falling down or guys being thrown down stairs. And of my peer group, I'm the only one really willing to fail at things. I'm not saying that your completelly wrong, but I'm not sure it's as easy to put our fingers on the specific reason.
(Incidentally, regarding algebra, I haven't specifically tried it on a class, but have you considered making use of an engineering perspective? Y'know, bringing ideas in specifically to solve a problem? When I used to tutor the "pre-pre-calculus" course, I generally worked off of John Roebling's notes from his design of the Brooklyn Bridge and similar things. Granted, I was at an engineering college, and only catching the students after they were taught the topic, but I generally found that it was more useful and even fun to teach the concepts as they arose in the course of solving the problems than trying to build/bridge from arithmetic to calculus.)
But for reading, BChat has it right, I think: Exposure is the key to any desire to learn. My parents read constantly on every topic, and they would read along to me (y'know, primitive phonics-like, with the finger pointing to the word being spoken). The result was my reading history books and novels (and the occasional computer book--I'm a bit younger than many of you) by kindergarten, and I still tear through books of all sorts regularly.
Incidentally, my parents are both high school dropouts with no interest in going back.
After all, why did kids pick up on Harry Potter when, just a year before, very smart people were predicting the end of the written word? Why are those kids still reading the Twilight books and other things? Somewhere along the way, reading became "in," with nary a celebrity-starring poster or even a single taxpayer dollar spent to do it. Sure, they're crappy books, but is "The Scarlet Letter" any better? "Billy Budd"?
(Sidenote: Whatever you think of Hester Prynne and company, go find anything else by Hawthorne. His entire output is fun and interesting, and almost entirely kid friendly. You'd never know they were written by the same guy.)
I would, by the way, encourage anybody interested in these issues to check out John Taylor Gatto's work, particularly "The Underground History of American Education." I don't agree with his specific conspiracy theory scenario (in which he blames key gatherings of people for dumbing us down and partitioning us for some elitist dystopia), instead favoring a more systemic approach (i.e., nobody has responsibility, so of course the goals have gone down the toilet), but the details and analysis he provides are amazing.
And in honor of the original topic, I see that he even released the (enormous) book online:
http://johntaylorgatto.com/underground/toc1.htmIf you're wondering where you remember the name, he was New York City's teacher of the year a kabillion times, including the time he made national news by using his acceptance speech to condemn the school system for failing so many students and then resign.