NATION'S BUSINESS
https://archive.org/stream/Nations-Business-1927-10/Nations-Business-1927-10_djvu.txtThe Saga of Joshua Cann
Now Joshua Cann was a bumboat man,
And a bum, bumboat had he,
For a Shipping Board boat that would barely float
Carried him over the sea.
He had bought this boat that would barely float
From our kind Shipping Board "as is."
it was full of squeaks and groans and creaks,
This bum, bumboat of his.
Josh was first to see in the rare whiffle tree,
The chance for profits large,
So to far-off Aloes, where the whiffle tree grows.
He guided his leaky barge.
And with each trip in his spavined ship
His earnings grew and grew.
Till at last he declared, "By Gosh, I be squared
With the bank and the coal yard and crew."
Now Ezra Spun was a Congressman,
And a powerful one was he.
Josh sent a letter to Ezra Kretter,
Of Whoosisville by the sea.
"Dear Ezra," it read, "start using your head,
For Whoosisville's shipping is large.
Between me and you we've got a canoe
And a sailboat and rowboat and barge!"
"Now your term will be short, if we don't get a port
For schooners and liners and such.
It would give jobs by dozens to uncles and cousins
Who never amounted to much."
So the harbor was cleared and huge docks appeared
For the sailboat and rowboat and scow.
Said Congress, "We're slipping, we've got to have shipping
To fill up these docks we have now."
So the Government bought some new ships and sought
To fill up the handsome new docks.
But isn't it funny that taxpayer's money
Should throw old Josh Cann on the rocks.
For the new ships are pretty, the captains are witty,
And the first mates are handsome and brave,
And these ships can move just as much as they choose,
While the taxpayers grumble and rave.
Old Joshua Cann is a bumboat man.
And his boat gets bummer each day.
While it waits in the dock for the auction block
That isn't so far away.
He couldn't compete with a government fleet
That runs their ships for fun.
Thus old Josh Cann, the bumboat man,
Was wrecked by Congressman Ezra Spun.
?H. F. Campbell.